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She might be sitting near the back of the room, near the edges. Not all the way back, because that would increase the likelihood of being called upon. She appears indifferent to her surroundings, possibly indulged in a new book or theory or most likely having a long-winded argument against herself. Her calm demeanor and simple attire draws no attention to herself and others would easily pass her by. You can catch her finding ways to be lazy ahem, efficient with her tasks and somehow managing a method to her madness. Microwaved meals and chicken nuggets never go out of style.
This may involve feelings of emptiness or loneliness, alerting them to the fact that their independent projects may, in and of themselves, be insufficient for achieving the deeper sense of wholeness and contentment they desire. At some level, INTPs feel like they need people and want an intimate relationship, while on another, they are afraid of losing themselves and their cherished freedom if they commit. Most partners are reluctant to grant them the degree of freedom and autonomy they desire, leading them to try to control the INTP.
This of course, prompts the INTP to rebel, which causes the relationship to take a turn for the worse.
As the final function in their stack, understanding and integrating their Fe is critical to their self-actualization. With that said, sustainable and satisfying romantic relationships can be hard to come by for INTPs, requiring that both they and their partners bring significant wisdom and maturity to the relationship.
For this reason, among others, most INTPs are better off abstaining from any long-term commitments until later in their development. Hence, INTPs look for partners who are intelligent, creative, and interested in personal growth. INTPs may struggle to maintain interest in those lacking sufficient intelligence, open-mindedness, or interests in intellectual or psychospiritual explorations.
INTPs are especially drawn to those who have knowledge or interests in their own specialty area, making way for a sort of co-exploration of truth. INTPs enjoy discussing their interest areas and seek a partner who can stay apace with them in theoretical conversations.
Since INTPs tend to view themselves as highly autonomous and self-sufficient, they usually look for similar traits in their partners. INTPs crave a lot of unfettered alone time and are rarely happy with partners who seem overly needy, demanding, or controlling. INTPs instinctively rebel in relationships where they feel smothered, stifled, or restrained. At the same time, less developed INTPs may find themselves drawn to individuals who are wounded or needy. Lifestyle is another vastly important consideration in relationships.
While INTPs can be quite flexible when it comes to living arrangements, they often prefer a partner who can live on less rather than more.
INTP Personality Traits
Decisions to get married, have children, or purchase an expensive home can create a sense of obligation and diminished freedom that INTPs can come to regret. In selecting an intimate partner, INTPs should be careful not to imbue their emotions with too much weight or decision-making power.
It is therefore important that INTPs not give their Fe the upper-hand in selecting a long-term partner. While having positive feelings toward an individual is certainly important, INTPs are better off using their top two functions Ti and Ne to determine the potential merits of a given relationship in light of their personal goals and values, as well as typological compatibility.
As I discuss elsewhere, it is common for all types to use various crutches to appease or placate their inferior function. INTPs may crutch their Fe, including their fear of being alone or unloved, by persisting in mediocre or codependent relationships. Since INTPs are prone to doubting whether true love exists, many continue in tepid relationships, feeling themselves without the strength or courage to leave and start over. So instead of leaving or working on the relationship, they focus their attention on their Ti pursuits, allowing the relationship to function as a mere background crutch for their Fe.
Because of the inferior position of their Fe, INTPs also run the risk of devaluing their partners and relationships. When in Ti mode, their Fe feelings can recede far into the background of their consciousness.
This can allow doubts about the relationship to emerge, such as thinking they are self-sufficient and unneeding of the relationship.
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In many cases, their work is granted greater priority, leading them to neglect their relationships if their work quota has not been met. Since they themselves are inner rule-makers, INTPs are prone to assuming that their partners harbor certain expectations of them i. When INTPs fail to voice their relational concerns, they may inwardly, even if unwittingly, begin to wall themselves off or inwardly rebel against their partners.
Rather than expressing themselves directly, they may turn to passive-aggressive forms of expression.
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So unless INTPs are careful to ensure open and honest communication in their relationships, they can end up crippling themselves and their relationships through their own assumptions and imaginings about their partners.
Because of difficulties associated with their inferior, perceived or actual shortcomings in their partner, as well as the open-ended and novelty-seeking nature of their Ne, INTPs can also be prone to infidelity. This propensity can be greatly reduced, however, if INTPs can find satisfaction in their work, choose their lifestyle carefully, select a suitable partner according to the criteria outlined earlier, regularly remind themselves of why they are in the relationship and why they chose their partner, and are committed to personal and relational growth and development.
While harmony can certainly be a part of a healthy relationship, it really has little to do with genuine intimacy or effective communication. When couples are working through these issues, moments of disharmony are all but inevitable.
In working to develop better communication in their relationships, INTPs need to become more aware of when they are acting out of fear, as well as when they are not telling the whole truth to their partner. Toward this end, INTPs can benefit from analyzing their past relationships to see where they failed to be honest or forthright in their communication.
Your INTP's most intimate need from you is an emotional refuge. If your INTP can put emotional vulnerability in your hands and get support, safety, and comfort (temporarily, mind you, because your INTP will be eager to feel confident and capable again), you really do have the magic touch. The INTP is one of the rarest types among the 16 Myers-Briggs Personality types. To be a female INTP is even rarer; only 2are women. If you find one, cherish her, because we are inconceivably unique and out of the ordinary. Here are some pros and cons of dating us INTP females. PROS. We are fiercely independent.
INTPs may feel like their partners are finding fault with them or seeing their expressions of love as inadequate. As tempting as it may be for INTPs to act on these negative emotions and staunchly defend themselves, this is rarely a wise course of action.
5 Things To Know About Dating an INTP
INTPs should always check their emotions against their other functions i. To investigate whether the emotion is trustworthy, INTPs should investigate matters with their partner to ensure they have not been making false assumptions.
INTPs who successfully integrate their Fe find the courage to express themselves and their convictions in a wise and discerning manner. They become less codependent and passive-aggressive, committing themselves to complete openness and honesty in their relationships. INTPs really want to be in control, especially when it comes to how they spend their time. They are most comfortable with small, social groups of people they already know and love. One of their biggest fears is rejection or making themselves the center of attention.
Rather, the INTP personality types will leave hints or clues for a potential partner, allowing them to make the first move. INTPs enjoy their personal freedom and can work very well independently for long periods of time.
Therefore, they are often reluctant to make relationships choices that would complicate their lives. However, their inferior function pushes them to surround themselves with people whom they love. This is often prompted by overwhelming loneliness or emptiness. INTPs are excited by the thought of having a partner, and thoroughly enjoy being around others and in long-term relationships. On the other hand, because INTPs are highly independent, the thought of long-term relationships scares them.
This is because they fear this will take away their independence. As a result, INTPs deal with a constant internal struggle. INTPs need people and want intimate relationships. On the other hand, they also want to maintain a level of personal freedom and independence. Their seemingly lack of commitment to a partner often leads to relationships issues over the long term.
INTPs who are in intimate relationships value their partners as their best friends as well as their closest confidant, and source of support. They often take their relationships very seriously.
Because INTPs are intuitive and introverted thinkers, they tend to be incredibly particular about whom they choose as a partner. INTPs are attracted to those who are intelligent, creative, and interested in personal goals. INTPs often struggle to maintain interest in those who lack open-mindedness or intelligence.
Additionally, INTPs also enjoy discussing their areas of interest with a partner. Therefore, they look for partners who can keep up with them in theoretical conversations. During the early phases of a relationship, INTPs are very direct and honest.
This is their attempt to establish a proper mindset and reach a mutual understanding to avoid misunderstandings and conflict. As you read this, you might be thinking about or identifying with many of these strengths, weaknesses, and personality type characteristics. So, are you one of the rare folks with the INTP personality type?
If you discover that you are in fact an INTP, then you are in good company! Below are some lists of INTP women, celebrities, and famous people.
The good news is that there are a number of free online INTP tests that can help determine if you are or aren't an INTP, and your true personality type. INTP Female. If you discover that you are in fact an INTP, then you are in good company! Below are some lists of INTP women, celebrities, and famous people. While having positive feelings toward an individual is certainly important, INTPs are better off using their top two functions (Ti and Ne) to determine the potential merits of a given relationship in light of their personal goals and values, as well as typological compatibility. Challenges in INTP Dating & Relationships. The INTP Female: A Highly Misunderstood Group 11 February / By Lily Yuan. Categories: Self-Discovery, INTP. She might be sitting near the back of the room, near the edges. Not all the way back, because that would increase the likelihood of being called upon. She appears indifferent to her surroundings, possibly indulged in a new book.
Women make up approximately 2 percent of all INTPs, compared to only 1 percent of men. Here is a list of some top female INTPs:. Please log in again. The login page will open in a new tab.
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