Not cons on online dating are
Posted in Online dating
If you are thinking of online dating , you probably want a wide supply of potential dates. You want to avoid the effort necessary for beginning it all the way from scratch as is the tradition and proceed to interested people. By checking out profiles, it is easy to fine tune and narrow done to your dream partner with little effort. This means you can select your ideal candidate based on their description of themselves, appearance, lifestyle, hobbies, and other definitions at one go. The best part is that if it does not work, you can easily change and try again almost instantly. This means there is no need to suffer in heartbreaks anymore as dating a next person is easier than you could ever imagine.
Or when their fake son, mother, grandparent whatever needs an operation. Or when they claim they need money for a ticket to come and see you.
His claim of only recently moving to your area is so there won't be a way to check him out locally. These people are beyond dishonest - really awful. If there's some way to get his IP info or whatever, you could perhaps report him to federal agencies. Be sure to report him to the dating site and get him banned. Run like heck. And do not IM with anyone like that. I've heard they can hack into computers from that, but I'm not sure.
As for the flowery poems, I'm sure he's sent those to many women. It's sickening.
Pros & Cons of Online Dating
I think I am being scammed from someone who I met on a local dating site. Said he lived about 30 minutes away. He also wants to chat on yahoo messenger. He hasn't asked for money yet. I almost want to toy with him but it wouldn't be fair to him. So does't really answer questions I ask him about that area. Thought I would share. Hi, Marion - I sure relate to what your mom is experiencing.
There are some organized scam operations on most dating sites, and they're getting better every year at sounding normal and honest. I'll send up some prayers for your mother to spot the bad apples and to find the jewels who are out there.
I love how you approached this from both sides to equip and protect as many people as possible. Vote up! My Mom just entered the dating field after being divorced from her 25 year marriage and she's been complaining a lot about scams she's running into. From what she hears from friends, who were scammed with rebound marriages, she's also going to insist on a prenup if she marries again. Scary online dating world out there.
Hope I can keep my marriage together so I don't find myself in it. Holy Cow! Tattuwrun - you came so close to getting scammed! Thank you, so much, for posting this first-person account of how these guys operate. This is exactly the type of con artist this article discusses, and having a 'real life' example is so helpful. I'm so, so glad you recognized what was going on before it hurt you - either financially or emotionally.
Good for you!!! I remember having "dated" someone I never even met yet - and gladly I didn't. While managing my account at a social media site, I received a private message from a guy and introduced himself. I looked at his profile pic - the guy looked ruggedly handsome, at least on that photo. And after that he would send me more PM's, and his words were becoming more romantic, flowery and passionate.
He said he would satisfy my needs sexually, emotionally and financially - and that he's living a comfortable life, does travelling as a hobby. He even recounted his past "tragedies" such as how his parents died in an accident that left him as an orphan, you know, those kind of sob stories. He would call me up almost every morning.
I wasn't quite falling for him yet but I found him charming. He said he would be ready to fly very soon to my country and visit me. He even said he was going to marry me, and buy a ring for me. So for me I just went with the flow, though I was starting to like him very much I just had to see how it would go. Until one time he PM'd me. He said he was in "Africa" for a "stopover", but he added that he was detained because he lacked certain documents in order for to get himself bailed.
And you know what? He said the authorities also needed money, and he said he didn't have anymore to pay them. So he was asking me for money, I said I didn't have much of that to save him. He insisted that I ask my friends and officemates for money - even a check or a voucher, etc. He was more persistent in sending me mails about the "bail money". All the romantic talk faded. At first I was genuinely worried about his so-called suffering.
Hey, wait a minute I realized that this guy was about to con me. So I replied to his offline messages and started taunting at him for days. He didn't reply to my messages and never bothered me again.
I'm also glad you publish this hub, so that people will never be victims of this scam. Voted up and useful. Hi, AmandaJon - it's great to hear a success story! Naturally, many of us know of happy couples who met online and later married.
May 08, Online Dating Cons and Scams. ated on February 9, Marcy Goodfleisch. more. Marcy has researched and written about relationships, domestic issues, dating, and con-artists for more than a decade. Contact Author. How to spot con countryconnectionsqatar.coms: Jan 24, We now know both sides of online dating pros cons to help you make an informed decision on whether you should get involved fully. It is important to take precaution and have a checklist of verifications before proceeding to meeting your online date. Online dating certainly is a grab bag of experiences. On the one hand, you hear horror stories of psychos and unsolicited d*** pics, and on the other hand, you personally know several couples who have met and married over the countryconnectionsqatar.com: Gina Stewart.
It's the con artists who make things difficult for people, though, which is what is being addressed here. Thanks for dropping by and commenting! Great hub, very useful tips!
Just like dating in the real world, online dating can be tough and there will always be pros and cons to any dating scenario. But, if you've had a few bad setups or are getting tired of waiting around to meet the right person and the right time, online dating can be a convenient, easy way to increase your options and help you get back out there. As it turns out, a simple analysis of the pros and cons of online dating can help out a great deal. Fortunately, the psychological research just happens to have such an analysis. Since the launch of countryconnectionsqatar.com in , men and women have struggled with the pros and cons of online dating. Millions of people log onto Internet dating sites, chat rooms and matchmaker services in an effort to find that special someone. Online dating isn't for everyone and while it's possible to jump into the.
This is so sad that people manipulate other people's emotions to get money from them, this is outrageous! But I have met my husband online 5 years ago, we still together and very happy. So for joining a dating site was one othe the best decisions in my life.
Don't let those con artist stop you from finding a date online, be careful and keep looking, Good luck! Wow - thanks for sharing this real-life experience - and good job in spotting the signs before you got defrauded. How I wish these people would be caught and prosecuted. I have just become a victim of this, however, i realise that things weren't right when he claimed his 6 year old son had been hit by a motorcycle and was in hospital with injuries he couldn't pay for.
I strung him along for the rest of the time. Even told him i was on the next flight with money to help. Eventually, i fronted him about it and first he denied it, then admitted it. I was actually trying to get details from him about who the guy he was posing as, who the pictures were of, have tried various sites to reverse search the pics myself and cannot find him, only one site in oregon might have one pic.
Lessons learnt, this site is very accurate. He was a man with a business working abroad, with a 6 year old son, claiming to live in London, when he was running everything from Nigeria. Hi, Dancingpopes - thanks for your very informative comment here. I think many women and some men would like a place where they could 'blacklist' the bad apples.
It's very true that being scammed out of your emotions is a painful experience - and it takes a long time to recover. If we could figure out what makes some people approach relationships with dishonestly, we would get rich! Great site!
Modern Love: A look at the pros and cons of online dating
I wish a site could be created listing the names of men and women from these sites like POF and MATCH who claim they want a relationship and tell you how great you are, etc, but JUST want sex, or tell you how great you are, meet you, and pretend to like you because they think you have money, only to find out you don't and suddenly they're gone. That would border on slander, I'm sure, and some people would list names out of spite, but wouldn't it be great in a perfect world if there could be a list of these people to check.
I've never been scammed out of money, I've been scammed of my feelings. Why must they go through the bulls of telling you how wonderful you are, what great chemistry you have, and what a great team you'd make? I'm so sorry you went through that, Jan - I know of others who have been conned, and it hurts on so many levels. How I wish there were easier ways to spot these jerks. Good information, I wish I had read this before I gave my money to a con artist.
He had my heart now I'm hurt and not trusting. He talked to me for hours months m Im and phone lie after lie protect yourself. I no longer will use dating sites. Hi, Graham - thanks for your kind words of support! It's very sad to see the increasing instances of dating scams every year.
Many of them are cottage industries in Third-World countries where groups of people troll websites dating or otherwise and send enticing messages. I guess the odds work in their favor, when they generate thousands of contacts but finally get big money when they pull someone into their net.
Hi Marcy. Congratulations on this wonderful hub. It is so informative and helpful. I don't need the services of these websites but a person who might, would do so well to read and absorb your efforts. Hi, HubbinNubbin - I don't personally have info on foreign sites - but I do know there are plenty of scammers who use sites based in the US but they live in other countries. This might be a good topic for either the Answers section on this site, or the Forum. Good luck - and be careful!
As my German is still much desired for, it has been a long journey for me to decide what is real and what is not. I was wondering if you guys have any tips in recognizing foreign online dating page scams? Like the technicalities, without having to know the language well? I am just starting out as a blogger by the way, if you guys have any tips or advice, contact me - I am always looking for new friends :.
Hi, Becky - that's a really great question - the only thing I can figure is that they find photos online, or scan good-quality magazine shots and use those. I've seen photos that were definitely part of a male model's portfolio.
They will stoop to anything to get someone's attention and hook them in.
Hi, Stephen - that is so true; those sites are money-makers. Now I am hearing of people trying to scam others on this site by contacting them personally about relationships or money. And, I just got a message from a stranger on LinkedIn that sounded all too fishy.
Dating sites are actually all over the net. Individuals must not be too desperate to find a date. Tips mentioned in your hub are a great help! Thanks for sharing it for everyone's benefit. I agree, MsKrysma - the hurts from these predators last for years. It is the worst form of deception.
Thanks so much for reading and commenting - I look forward to your hubs! It's sad and very wrong for con artists to hurt others who are just looking for love. I hope people recongnize the signs that someone is not right for them beofre they do get hurt. All's good here, sweet Marcy - and we totally agree - the con artists are not only another breed they're downright scary. Hi, Sis - it's good to see you!
Thanks for reading and commenting here.
I've been on a few sites, too, which is how I was able to research this hub. There are indeed people of both genders looking for money and a caretaker they generally want marriage, in order to get the caretaker benefits. The con artists are yet another breed - they're only out to scam people, right from the start.
Either way, it's discouraging to sift through all that in the hopes of finding the diamond amongst the lumps of coal. Great work and research,Marcy. I tried a couple of dating sites years ago just for fun. Found there's a lot of guys looking for women my age - they need a nurse or a purse and I wasn't available for either. Hi, Alocsin - what a great tip about identifying photos! You always have the best information about the ins and outs of Internet use - thanks for sharing this!
I think in matters of the heart, people aren't so wary as they should be. These tips should be very helpful. As for the fake photo, if you drag a photo from a website into Google Images, it'll will show you where the photo is from. Voting this Up and Useful.
Thanks so much for your comment here, adjkp - I'm glad you never had to be exposed to this type of thing. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. I'm so thankful that I met my wife young and didn't go the online dating route.
I have heard about people falsifying their profiles but, after reading this, there is so much more for people to be aware of. Thanks for your comment here, Margie - and I am so sorry your girlfriend has run into those issues.
It is disheartening to see what happens in the name of dating. Thanks for reading and sharing! I'm so glad I'm not dating anymore. However, I have a ton of girlfriends who are. One was a physical threat and the other stole her money. Hi, Allie - it's so sad to hear of the people who've been hurt through these dishonest schemers.
I know there are decent people on those sites, too, but people need to be aware of the not-so-good users as well. I'm glad you've put this information together. Like others who have commented, I have heard so many horror stories about this.
The unfortunate thing about online dating is that people can represent themselves in any way they choose so you really don't know for sure what you're getting with these.
Oooh - that is creepy, to get contacted on this site. I had an odd message early on from someone asking me for personal help, but not the 'Hi, you're cute' stuff. I hope you reported this to the moderators? The person probably contacted several Hubbers. These con artists hit up anywhere they can get messages to people. Hi, its funny that you should mention the 'divorced with a son' thing. I actually received an email the other day from a new 'hubbber' he hasn't written anything yet, who said, 'I think you are cute, can you email me?
I am divorced with a son and so on! I felt like writing back and saying, this isn't a dating site, but I didn't want him to know my email. I would never trust these sites, I have heard to many horror stories. I have watched programs on tv about women who give out thousands of pounds so that the guy can come over to the uk, or meet them abroad, and they never find them again after losing all that money.
I feel like shaking them for their stupidity! Hi, Kittyjj - I truly hope you never need these, too! And I hope, if they need them, the information here helps your friends avoid these con artists! Excellent tips on online dating. Hopefull I won't be needing it though. But I am happy to share them with my friends who I think might be interested. Hi, drbj - I'm so glad you like the hub and the movie - which I love, by the way!
Wow - what a story, Aviannovice! You should write about that experience - I'm so glad you gave that example here. The con artists are experts; they know what will work how to get the moneyand will quickly move on if they can't get cooperation. I met one woman who paid a guy's way to the USA, with the plan they would marry. He didn't even had standing in the church. The emotional recovery is so traumatic for people who have been conned.
Cons on online dating
And then of course they've been damaged financially, too. Thank you for sharing this! You are so smart to have figured it out before you were taken advantage of. Very realistic cautions, Marcy, for those who wish to utilize online dating sites. Thanks for the 'Scoundrels' clip - I had forgotten how funny that movie really was. The profiles are good, because they belonged to someone else that got turned off by the dating site because there was a scammer. The scammer already had their info, so voila!
I ran into a couple of those losers. One dumb enough to send "form" letters with all the misspellings, and one that forgot who he was and sent the same letter under another name. They are generally tied to western Africa, like Ghana or Nigeria. Mine claimed to be half Cuban and half Nigerian, living in CA. By the way, they didn't get a nickel from me, though the attempt was made. Claimed mom was in the hospital in Nigeria and the US check wouldn't be accepted as it had to clear.
I knew what was going to happen and I offered my Visa, but the hospital had to contact me. I was flatly refused and told it had to be Western Union or nothing. So I said, okay,nothing it is. And that was the end of that. Great hub. Thanks for all your research, a quality I have come to expect and enjoy in your hubs. Hi, Karthikkash - I did some research on this a few years ago, and the scams were really easy to spot.
Now, that's not the case. They've gotten expert at writing good profiles and they know photos are important. So people need to scrutinize the package, and then watch behaviors carefully. Thanks for stopping by and commenting! Hi, Prasetio - your friend is right to alert you to the risks.
There are some great and worthy people on the sites, but since those sites are one of the main venues for predators, it's important to take care. Thanks for commenting here!
Actually I really interested with online dating, but my friend said that I must be careful with kind of dating site. There are many scams out there. I started with free online dating site,but it's more bad. Though we can find legitimate company which provide truly information for the member of their site. Thanks for share with us. Marcy, I learn many things here. Rated up and useful! They make weird requests. Online dating can take a lot of time.
Everything in moderation - just like the good doctor tells you. Try not to crash and burn, or hire it out. There are companies like mine that take the weight off. Everybody gets rejected at one time or another online. The hottie online is often a nottie in real life. The paradox of choice teaches us that the more options we have, the unhappier we are and the more paralyzed we become to choose.
I have this problem whenever I try to buy a nice cheese. I often wonder if I got the right one. Sure there are lots of people online and the grass can always feel greener for another date.
Pros of Online Dating
Have you experienced this. The solution: Not much you can do here besides suggesting some helpful tips to them, and they may freak out at you.
Hope to make a new friend who can teach you a thing or two. Although this is makes people choosy and judgmental, it can be viewed as a major advantage of online dating sites. The biggest problem here is that not everyone tell the truth about themselves and you may have to wait to meet the person to actually tell who they really are.
As a result, the traditional face-to-face becomes the winning method to dating as a proof of what people really are. You will need to be careful because there are many people whose agenda is not entirely matched to yours life-long partner.
It is important learn online dating facts to be safe. Admittedly, you can have instant and quick communication into your potential relationship without beating about the bush. The sites provide many ways you can meet and know about people personally before you actually meet in person.
This early preparation lets you have a safe and relaxed interaction to prepare you for the encounter. Virtual dating has proven attractive to people who are busy and without enough time to get out and socialize. If you are compelled to live an online social life because of a complicated lifestyle of heavy commitment, you are one of the appropriate candidates for online dating. With online dating, you will be learning about the intentions of your potential partner almost instantly when scanning their profile.
They are upfront and clear about their wants and needs. This is better than picking up a lady at a bar because there is little you can know about their wants and needs in a relationship or from you. Here, you have a chance to flirt and send all sorts of messages before meeting the person. If it does not work, you can leave without investing too much of your effort and money.
This is a great opportunity to avoid getting too involved in something that may never work. For those who are new to the Internet and slightly concerned about revealing too much about their private life, there are safety measures put in place to remain discreet.
This is an attractive feature to the newbies and laid back people. If you are introverted, you can also have fun in online dating sites and find the appropriate date for you.
To help you get the right approach to virtual dates, you need to also learn the negative online dating facts.